Patricia Deaton photographed beside the Mona Woody painting that inspired her poem at Alexander County Library on July 13, 2019.
THE YEAR WE LOST
OURSELVES
by Patricia Deaton
after Dream Up by Mona Woody
She was gone in
March, unexpectedly.
We collectively
missed her;
the mother, daughter,
wife, sister,
cousin and
grandmother of two
who eventually
wouldn’t remember her at all.
Without warning, no
more of her laughter
or self-deprecating
humor; no one to ask
when her helpful
heart gave out.
We tried to celebrate
the birthdays that came.
Without her, our
cheer rang hollow, especially
on her own birthday.
Then on her son’s,
who gulped and smiled
through his bewilderment.
Easter, and the
little ones wore rabbit ears
hid plastic eggs, a
surprise in each. We knew
we would never be
surprised again by anything.
Mother’s Day lasted a
thousand days.
Fireworks on the 4th
lit our faces
hollow-eyed and
reverent in a shower of light
that disappeared like
sparks going out.
On Halloween, no one
wanted to participate.
No trick could match
Death’s trick. No treat, enough.
We bowed to
Thanksgiving and Christmas, still
couldn’t say that she
had died. Instead we said
When she was sick or when that happened to her
as if she had
miraculously made it through
and we weren’t all
changed forever.
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